1. The best of me is yet to come.
2. I’m jealous of my parents, I’ll never be able to have a kid as cool as theirs.
3. God bless this hot mess!
4. Where the heck am I? How did I get here?
5. Hi, my hobbies include breakfast, lunch and dinner.
6. A very caffeine dependant life form.
7. Always aiming to be a rainbow at the end of a thunderstorm.
8. Perfect has seven letter and so does meeeeee.
9. Kind of a good samaritan, terrible athlete, but extremely blessed in the napping skills department.
10. I have to be funny, because being hot just isn’t an option for me at this point.
11. Just another paper-cut survivor.
12. Just keep swimming.
13. Living vicariously through myself.
14. Making history.
15. Here to serve… The cat overlord.
16. I always prefer my puns to be intended.
17. Hard work never killed anyone, but why take the chance?
18. I hope one day I love something the way women in commercials love yogurt.
19. Recovering donut addict.
20. Just over here having an allergic reaction to everyday life.
21. I still don’t understand Instagram, but here I am anyways.
22. Life is too short to wear boring undies.
23. I’m not actually funny, I’m really mean and people think I’m joking. I’m not.
24. We are born naked, hungry and wet. Then things just get worse.
25. You is kind, you is smart, you is important.
26. Die having memories, don’t die with just dreams.
27. Chocolate never asks me any questions, chocolate understands me.
28. Inserts pretentious crap about myself here.
29. Life is really short, try to smile while you still have all of your teeth.
30. Time is precious, waste it wisely.
31. The only person on Instagram who doesn’t claim to be a social media guru.
31. “Be strong,” I whispered to my wifi signal.
33. Take care of your body, it’s the only place you have to live.
34. Stay humble. Be kind. Work hard.
35. Throwing kindness around like confetti.
36. Don’t quit your day dream.
37. Silent people tend to have the loudest minds.
38. To truly live is the greatest adventure there is.
39. Be all in or get out. There is no in between.
40. My goal is to create a life that I don’t want to take a vacation from.
41. Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.
42. Trying to elevate small talk to medium talk.
43. Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.
44. Currently starring in my own reality show titled, A Modern Cinderella; One Girl’s Search for Love and Shoe.
45. Nice guys finish lunch.
46. I’m here to avoid friends on Facebook.
47. How we live our life is far more important than how we say we live our life.
48. Chocolate doesn’t ask questions, chocolate understands.
49. My relationship status? Netflix, Oreos and sweatpants.
50. I only use Instagram to stalk…
51. I’ve always thought being popular on Instagram is as about as useless as being rich in monopoly.
52. A human. Being.
53. Be a fruit loop in a bowl of cheerios.
54. I can’t remember who I stole my bio from or why.
55. I’m real and I hope some of my followers are too.
56. Hey, you are reading my bio again?!
57. This isn’t rocket science, you take a photo of brunch and you hashtag #yolo #sundayfunday.
58. Stay classy.
59. Stay strong, the weekend is coming.
60. Don’t be like the rest of them, darling.
61. I liked memes before they were on Instagram
62. We all start as strangers.
63. These are the days we live for.
64. So, you’re on Instagram? You must be an amazing photographer.
65. Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
66. You know what I like about people? Their dogs.
67. First I drink the coffee. Then I do the things.
68. I already want to take a nap tomorrow.
69. I might look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.
70. Good times and tan lines
71. Never. Stop. Exploring.
72. Keep your heels, head & standards high.
73. Your best teacher is your last mistake.
74. Everyday is a second chance.
75. You can’t buy happiness but you can buy a plane ticket, and that’s kind of the same thing.
76. Be happy. Be bright. Be YOU.
77. Be a pineapple: Stand up straight, wear a crown and always be sweet on the inside.
78. Be the reason someone believes in the goodness of people.
79. Always wear your invisible crown.
80. Travel far enough you meet yourself.
81. Kanye attitude with Drake feelings.
82. We’re all just molecules.
83. Don’t let Instagram define your self worth.
84. Depressed, stressed, but still well dressed.
85. We are born to be real, not perfect.
86. Sand in my toes and saltwater in my curls.
87. You keep me safe. I’ll keep you wild.
88. Burn for what you love.
89. So many books, so little time.
90. To infinity and beyond.
91. The bags under my eyes are Gucci.
92. Always give 100% — unless you’re donating blood.
93. Living one day at a time, with a fresh baked cookie. Okay. And with a coffee. And maybe some chocolate. But I promise to take my vitamins.
94. I’m very busy and important.
95. All you hipsters need to stop wearing Nirvana shirts if you don’t even listen to them.
96. I can quote (Insert movie) better than you and all your friends.
97. In search of sleep, sanity, & The Shire.
98. Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick, and pull yourself together.
99. This is my simple Chipotle dependent life.
100. Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things.
101. Knowledge is like underwear, important to have, but not necessary to show off.
102. The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!
103. This seat is taken.
104. My only real long term goal is to never end up on Ellen.
105. World’s most annoying couple.
106. Give me the chocolate and nobody gets hurt.
107. Maybe she’s born with it.
108. It’s not a phase mom, it’s who I am.
109. Ugg life.
110. Strong women rule the world.
112. You can’t make everybody happy, you aren’t a jar of Nutella.
113. I like hashtags because they look like waffles.
114. Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles.
115. If you fall, I’ll be there – Floor, 2018
116. Taking naps is so childish, I prefer to call them horizontal life pauses.
117. I followed my heart, it led me to the fridge.
118. Namast’ay in bed.
119. I don’t look like this in real life.
120. It’s never too late to be who you might have been.
121. All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips.
122. Bad decisions make for the best stories.
123. (insert Drake lyrics here)
124. Professional Netflix Marathon Runner.
125. Everybody is so happy… I hate that.
126. Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.
127. Don’t follow me because I don’t even know where I’m going.
128. A Nomad in search for the perfect burger.
129. I wanna be different just like everyone else.
130. Never forget, the world is yours. Terms and conditions may apply.
131. I smile because I have no idea what is going on anymore.
132. I can resist everything except temptation.
133. God gave me a lot of hair, but not a lot of height.
134. Acts like summer & walks like rain.
135. My blood is made of coffee.
136. Naturally and artificially flavored.
137. I dare you to believe in yourself, You deserve all things magic.
138. Do justly. Love mercy. Walk humbly.
139. My autobiography is this mess of pics.
140. Love yourself as much as you want to be loved.
141. Somewhere out there my soulmate is pushing a pull door. I just know it.
142. Pretty sure my hair is 85% dry shampoo.
143. Passion changes everything.
144. 5’2 is my height but my attitude is 6’1.
145. Catch flights not feelings.
146. Disappointed but not surprised.
147. Watch more sunsets than Netflix.
148. Always classy, never trashy, and a little bit sassy.
149. The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
150. Today I will be as useless as letter g in lasagna.
Read more: thoughtcatalog.com